Ken, I am so sorry! There are no words that can relieve that pain, only time. Please know that you have friends on this thread and though we cannot be there in person for you that we grieve along with you. Stay strong!
Lieutenant Z wrote:
Curtis I kept all my MF Nikon lenses but I'm currently in love with two FL : 20mm et 55mm. Thus I mainly play with the nikon 20mm f/2.8ais and the Zeiss-Sony 55mmf/1.8 for now.
That is comforting to hear Philippe since it makes transition to a Nikon mirrorless camera a bit easier if you choose to go that way. I certainly understand your appreciation for the 55mm focal length. I love it, as is likely evident from what I post.
Always appreciate seeing your work Philippe. Thanks for sharing with us.
Ballard wrote:
One week ago today David, my partner of 23 years, died at home in my arms. This was the end of a 13 year struggle with multiple myeloma, a type of bone marrow cancer. He had been on home hospice the last 2 weeks after several hospitalizations starting late July.
I’m exhausted—both emotionally and physically. Eventually I’ll return to photography and other interests, but for now I have no energy or enthusiasm.
Glad you shared your news with all of us Ken. Doubtless all of us who are in long term committed relationship understand the magnitude of your loss. Take good care of yourself my friend. And don't be a stranger on the thread. You have friends here.
Ballard wrote:
One week ago today David, my partner of 23 years, died at home in my arms. This was the end of a 13 year struggle with multiple myeloma, a type of bone marrow cancer. He had been on home hospice the last 2 weeks after several hospitalizations starting late July.
I’m exhausted—both emotionally and physically. Eventually I’ll return to photography and other interests, but for now I have no energy or enthusiasm.
The only thing I can even get out is, I'm so so sorry.
Ken, so sorry for your loss. If you need an open ear or shoulder to cry on, mine is always handy.
Ballard wrote:
One week ago today David, my partner of 23 years, died at home in my arms. This was the end of a 13 year struggle with multiple myeloma, a type of bone marrow cancer. He had been on home hospice the last 2 weeks after several hospitalizations starting late July.
I’m exhausted—both emotionally and physically. Eventually I’ll return to photography and other interests, but for now I have no energy or enthusiasm.
Ballard wrote:
One week ago today David, my partner of 23 years, died at home in my arms. This was the end of a 13 year struggle with multiple myeloma, a type of bone marrow cancer. He had been on home hospice the last 2 weeks after several hospitalizations starting late July.
I’m exhausted—both emotionally and physically. Eventually I’ll return to photography and other interests, but for now I have no energy or enthusiasm.
Ken, my most heartfelt condolence to you, my Dad had 12 years of struggle with illness and that gave me a sense of how exhausting emotionally that is. Life brings you happiness in the company of David and sorrow in his loss. Hope you have a circle of friends and family nearby.
Ken,
I'm sorry you are a member of the club that nobody wants to join. There is nothing I can say to make it better; other than to let you know that I have been widowed as well, so you are not alone in your grief. Michael Goshorn (a widower) started Widownet back when there were services like AOL, Prodigy, and Compuserv. (about 25 years ago). It has morphed into social media versions, websites, and listserves. You can find information HERE about grieving, and healing. There is a "BB3" (Bulletin Board) that covers many topics, and stages of profound loss. When you are ready you may want to check it out. I was widowed over 20 years ago, but I remember well the raw stage grief. Everyone grieves differently, and they are all correct IMO. I promise you that you will come to a place that the very memories that cause pain now can make you smile. It is a journey.
Jim
Ballard wrote:
One week ago today David, my partner of 23 years, died at home in my arms. This was the end of a 13 year struggle with multiple myeloma, a type of bone marrow cancer. He had been on home hospice the last 2 weeks after several hospitalizations starting late July.
I’m exhausted—both emotionally and physically. Eventually I’ll return to photography and other interests, but for now I have no energy or enthusiasm.
Wanted to let Curtis know that I am not laying
in an alley somewhere with a fruitful drink
I am in Kentucky again working with only an IPad
And it’s hard enough to read the thread on the thing
and no fun to type on it
Lurking till I get home to the IMac
Ken, I’m so sorry for your loss. Having lost my father, mother-in-law, and three very close friends to cancer (in the last 2 years alone)... I am feeling your pain right along with you. If you ever want to talk, shoot me a PM and I will give you my number.
I met Ken and his partner David in the middle of July. I posted a photo on the thread taken the evening we met and had dinner. David went back to their Air BnB while Ken and I drove to the Golden Gate bridge. The next day the three of us hung out together in San Anselmo. I posted photos from that day of both Ken and David.
David was a lovely guy who had worked both as an intensive care and hospice nurse. Because of his journey with multiple myeloma I shared with him a copy of the Living/Dying Project newsletter that included an article I wrote about a dear woman who died from ALS the end of 2016. We spoke about his journey which had been a long one. I believe he was ready to go.
We've observed in the past how the simple fact we've been in conversation for so long means we've been open to the vagaries of life which include both joy and sadness. We hope for the joy but must always be prepared for those moments that lead to sadness and grief. I really appreciate the outpouring of sympathy from folks on this thread. I'm reminded of the story about the woman who came to the Buddha after the sudden death of her young child asking how this could happen. The Buddha asked her to go to the home that has not experienced the loss of a loved one and get a mustard seed to bring back to him. Of course, she learned as she visited neighboring homes that loss is experienced by everyone. We've all known loss, so it becomes natural to meet others grief with an open heart, especially the grief of someone we've gotten to know over time.
David was a favorite subject of Ken's photography... something we likely all experience with our loved ones. He's shared some of those photos with me, including a few taken close to the end of David's life. They are powerful images... reminders of how intimate photography can be when photos are taken with an open heart. We have that opportunity. What an honor.
Reagan wrote:
Wanted to let Curtis know that I am not laying
in an alley somewhere with a fruitful drink
I am in Kentucky again working with only an IPad
And it’s hard enough to read the thread on the thing
and no fun to type on it
Lurking till I get home to the IMac
Reagan
Thanks for the heads up Reagan. I imagine you're taking care fo family business. I definitely share your pain when it comes to trying to type on an iPad. I'm guessing your not a big fan of texting either.
A friend has a keyboard affixed to her iPad and her fingers fly on the thing. I'd consider that myself but I already bought a MacBook Air for situations when the iMac isn't handy. As a matter of fact, I'm sitting at it this moment at Sue's home waxing eloquent on this thread.
Have a good trip Reagan and remember, bourbon has alcohol in it too...
Reagan wrote:
Wanted to let Curtis know that I am not laying
in an alley somewhere with a fruitful drink
I am in Kentucky again working with only an IPad
And it’s hard enough to read the thread on the thing
and no fun to type on it
Lurking till I get home to the IMac
