I think you'll find that when the camera meter is involved with the flash metering (especially matrix mode) it is not metering the brightest area or the darkest area, but rather any area that is not so dark (or far away) as to reflect "nothing" and not so bright (or close) as to reflect too much. A comparison is made between the ambient metering results and the pre-flash metering results, and an exposure for the flash is based on how much the lighting needs to be scaled up. This is what the Canon system does too and I figure the Nikon system does it better because it has more metering segments to work with (e.g. 1005 on the D700 vs just 21 to 63 on a Canon 1-series pro camera). Working this way prevents a reflection off a silver plate or mirror from shutting the flash output right down and allows the flash to work off a persons face instead of his black suit. Because the metering segments are smaller it is able to ignore a smaller portion of the entire image when there is a specular highlight, and so it tends to get the rest right more often.
- Alan