Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

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Archive 2010 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

Mitchel107
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p.3 #1 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

lisy78 wrote:
[...snip]
You will be a MUCH HAPPIER person when you try to confront someone directly and clearly and with 100% intensity about something that bothers you. My better half has a problem with this because she doesn't want to seem like the bad guy pointing out something that to her is obvious (you know... she's an adult type thing) ... and frankly I've seen this cause relationships that could have blossomed if some issues were headed off immediately turn seriously cancerous. I would strongly advise you to think about this and work on changing that. I can assure you that YOU will be a much happier person once you start being clear about your expectations and your feelings as soon as practical after an event takes place.

I like the way you put that, man.

Feb 09, 2010 at 05:43 PM

saturnkk
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p.3 #2 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

About behavior:

The accountability for inappropriate behavior rests upon the individual. This woman's behavior, as described by the OP does not fall in a gray area and in fact would be justification for dismissal in most corporate atmospheres. It is the OP's CHOICE whether to deal directly with this behavior (my preferred method) or avoid it completely as he cannot anticipate how this communication would be received, espceicially by someone as seemingly inappropriate as this individual.

About Notice:

Her circumstance is of no responsibility to you. I imagine that you are under an employment at will agreement. If you are as upset by her behavior as you indicate, other working arrangements should be sought. Again, whether she is pregnant or breaks her arm should have no bearing under these circumstances at hand. While a 2 week notice is perceived to be a MANAGERIAL expectation norm for notice (and helps to not burn bridges in some circumstances) it is by no means the end all be all. After all, how much notice does the employee get when he/she is "let go?" If you do give 2 weeks (or any notice) be prepared to be unceremoniously walked to the door at that very moment. It is no longer your option at that point, to continue working, you have given that up for whatever the length of your notice is.

Good Luck! And if possible and where you feel comfortable, it is best in the future to set expectations with coworkers immediately on what is and is not acceptable behavior at work.

Feb 09, 2010 at 06:54 PM

Mitchel107
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p.3 #3 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

I think I'm just going to tell her next time I see her that an investor has approached me with interest and is going to make a nice sum of cash available to me in June and see where that goes.

Feb 09, 2010 at 07:02 PM

lisy78
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p.3 #4 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

Mitchel107 wrote:
I think I'm just going to tell her next time I see her that an investor has approached me with interest and is going to make a nice sum of cash available to me in June and see where that goes.

Your call (of course!) but I would NOT do that.

Not unless you're prepared for:

1. Getting asked to leave NOW.

2. Having the investor vanish into thin air and then be the laughingstock of your former boss and her acquaintances .....

...true story.. one of my ex coworkers got an offer to go work for a fantastic startup. Awesome office environment - always casual ... open door policy ... use of the company Jet for weekend Miami-Vegas flights (company would have headquarters in both places so ceo would be flying out... employees welcome to fly along).

So she gave her two weeks notice, then left.

Then a few weeks later the venture capitalists pulled the plug, the startup never got off the ground and the jet was appropriated by creditors.

She now works for the Geek Squad.

Let's just say in retrospect while I totally understand her excitement at the time, it would have been much wiser to simply say she was leaving to work for a startup... and leave it at that.

To this day... some 6-7 years later when she comes by the office to visit (which is kinda weird considering she wasn't socially friends with anyone) and she leaves there are still folks who ask me if I saw her fly in by jet or if she'd driven.

...

oh and OT: what the heck is up with investors not finding more lucrative opportunities to put their money in than wedding photography businesses. You're the second peep here to mention an investor looking to put dough into their biz... and as someone who has done some (limited) investing I could think of tons and tons of things I'd throw my money out on before I'd give anything to an aspiring wedding photographer

.

Hey... I'm totally not really knocking you or the idea ... if the paperwork looks good, go for it. I wish you AND YOUR INVESTOR awesome financial success!!!!

Feb 09, 2010 at 07:13 PM

saturnkk
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p.3 #5 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

^---This...

saturnkk wrote:
be prepared to be unceremoniously walked to the door at that very moment. It is no longer your option at that point, to continue working, you have given that up for whatever the length of your notice is.

Feb 09, 2010 at 07:15 PM

lisy78
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p.3 #6 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

On second thought ... I guess you could say that I also found an investor that decided to fund my photography business... myself

... let me tell you ... my investor is NOT doing too well so far ha ha ha! I'm having a great time and getting great gigs but I've also sucked a lot of cash out of the poor bastard to get all sorts of cool gear ... dude may never see a penny... but me and my clients? Pigs in mud!

One thing I have to say about my investor... he is not a very savvy investor... but he is so damn good-looking!

Feb 09, 2010 at 07:17 PM

Wolfe_boy
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p.3 #7 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

Aaaah, I see now. The investor in question is indeed that investor of fame and repute. Let me see if I have the whole order of events in place here.

1. You had a photography business. It failed, for one reason or another.
2. You found photography work with someone who doesn't treat you well, but (obviously) runs a viable business.
3. A friend offers you $20K to reopen your photography business.

...hopefully leading it's way to...

4. a) Having learned from said poor employer how to run a viable business, you reopen your studio with the $20K loan and are wildly successful.

...however must try hard to avoid...

4. b) Having learned nothing from said poor employer about how to run a viable business, you burn through your $20K loan in 6 months and are back step 1 again, minus the aforementioned jilted investor.

Best of luck to you, I suppose. I don't forsee this ending well, for some reason, but I like being proved wrong.

Feb 09, 2010 at 07:23 PM

lisy78
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p.3 #8 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

Ah! Same investor situation! Good catch Wolfe!

Here I thought there was a crazy investor trend developing that I might need to learn more about

I'm going to slightly revise my recommendation then

If I were you I'd keep my big mouth shut until I have the cash in hand from the investor. I'd then extend a 2 week notice with an option to freelance at a reasonable rate afterwards to help ensure there is no negative impact to her business. Farts and belches aside you're better off having someone who thinks well of you than otherwise... you never know when she might get an inquiry for a booked date.

I'd then spend every day between now and then trying to figure out what the heck this belching/farting/chick who can make a 5D2+70-200 look worse than my wife's Fuji F10 is doing RIGHT that's enabling her to actually stay in business.

I realize that I'm mostly repeating what Wolfe said... but thing is... IT BEARS REPEATING.

Feb 09, 2010 at 07:37 PM

Mitchel107
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p.3 #9 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

lisy78 wrote:

I'd then spend every day between now and then trying to figure out what the heck this belching/farting/chick who can make a 5D2+70-200 look worse than my wife's Fuji F10 is doing RIGHT that's enabling her to actually stay in business.

She always tells me she isn't making money....something I learned after starting here. Her mom owns some property including an apartment complex. I'm fairly sure that her mom has donated, over time, a huge sum of money to keep the business going.

While my most recent talks with my investor buddy have included things like 'we are going to have to go over what happens if the venture fails, what consequences are we going to agree on for breech of contract/late payment type of stuff and this is a risky venture', he has responded with 'MItch, I've seen your stuff, asked around and I have confidence in your brain, business and art'. Then he follows up with how confident he is with his monies' availability.

One thing I agree on, though is to keep my big mouth shut for right now. Thinking on the way to work (I'm here alone again), I decided to not count my chickens before they hatch, as the kids are saying these days....

I want to thank you guys for taking a look at my situation and offering input. I don't know if anyone here knows, but I'm pretty much alone at anything I do and resources like FM are hugely valuable to me. I know I'm not the best photographer and I love Pentax (woot!) and I'm not always polite (sorry ksmarghts) but I'm trying to hang in there....

Feb 09, 2010 at 09:02 PM

Mitchel107
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p.3 #10 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

Wolfe, I don't think I should say that the business 'failed.' I was actually overbooked with regard to how much workload I thought I could take on. I stopped bookings but kept the business as an entity in order to finish up my backlogged work and redesign my processes and strategy.

Soon, with new guts in it, the biz will simply get new gear, new marketing and start taking bookings again and work in a more efficient way. I learned from my own self how NOT to run my biz, and those were the lessons that I first took to the drawing board when I started my redesign of things. Along the way, I have also shot for other photographers and learned some tips and tricks. When I started the first time, the economy was crashing. My school loans were missing in action because my state had run out of money and the bar where I was working nights let me go to hire 'boobs'.

I had nothing, I was hungry. My camera became my job. The only thing I did right at that time was to only accept clients that fit me. I got my share of bookings, but I wasn't outsourcing anything because I was too proud to put my artwork into the hands of a graphic designer. BIG MISTAKE. Let's just say now my genius epiphany is that I still have the raw files to fix anything I don't like from any graphic designer....(DOH!)

Feb 09, 2010 at 09:12 PM

bryanlindsey
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p.3 #11 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

Mitchel107 wrote:
WHAT KIND OF STRAIN WOULD A NEW OR EXPECTING MOTHER FEEL IN THIS SITUATION

It could be huge.

You know how adrenaline tends to burn things into your memory more permanently? The preggo hormones do the same thing. I base that on 11 years of marriage with a woman who went from unpregnant wife to pregnant wife to mother.

Women are hard to understand in the first place. Pregnant women...oh em gee.

Feb 10, 2010 at 08:01 PM

Mitchel107
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p.3 #12 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

welp, doesn't matter now. she said she got six emails from here informing her of my thoughts. I got let go.

I can't say I'm unhappy about it because I wasn't happy working here anyway.

have you ever just had to air yourself out and talk to someone not involved to get a different perspective? well that's what I was doing. unfortunately I don't have much in the way of family and friends who can give me the perspective I was looking for. I sought it out on fred miranda.

I half knew that she would read this thread because it's public. I didn't, however, think anyone would go out of their way to tattle on me for airing out my thoughts.

I know I'm not the best guy in the world, I just wanted some advice.

Feb 11, 2010 at 08:09 PM

maxwell1295
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p.3 #13 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

She got e-mails from posters here? No way! That sucks if it's true...

I think she just read the threads herself and just said that to use it as a reason for letting you go.

Feb 11, 2010 at 08:27 PM

Mitchel107
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p.3 #14 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

just repeating what she said....
(edit: but don't she got six, I think she got one)

I HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO NOW WOO HOO!!

Feb 11, 2010 at 09:20 PM

ksmahgrts
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p.3 #15 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

how would someone even know who she is? bizarre.

i have no problem voicing my opinion on an issue, but screwing with someone's livelihood? yuck. that's just sad.

Feb 11, 2010 at 10:50 PM

Mitchel107
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p.3 #16 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

i know ksmahgrts isn't that weird i wonder who would have put that kind of effort into it....

anyway, my office is now set up and functional again. whoever sent the email to tattle on me just made my life harder a little bit for couple of months. things will get better fast.

funny, my three nephews like to tattle on each other from time to time. im kind of used to it and i kind of saw this coming. it's just a bit weird that there are 'grown up' tattle tails.

it's fine. it's good. we had a party to celebrate my termination.

it's also weird that i'm still a bit concerned about my former boss and her baby. but hey....

things happen right?

Feb 12, 2010 at 05:15 AM

gravy graffix
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p.3 #17 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

wow wtf? thats all I have to say.

Feb 12, 2010 at 06:00 AM

jdhart73
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p.3 #18 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

you "thought" she might read the thread talking about farts, and burps etc.... come on man!

Feb 12, 2010 at 06:25 AM

HJ_Mayes
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p.3 #19 · Different Kind of Prego Photog Situation

I think in this instance it would have been better to do as kyssmehgrats

suggested and talk about this ahead of time before anyone had a chance to tattle.

A business owner and professional conducts himself/herself in a manner becoming just that - not someone who must talk about their unsavory situation behind the bosses back, which is exactly what you just did. Whether your pictures were better or not, she was your boss and employer and you owed her at least that.

If you were unhappy it was your responsibility to voice your concerns and then go if your needs are not being met.

Consider this a lesson learned. Someday you may have employees too.

Let this be a lesson in the future.

Feb 12, 2010 at 07:52 PM

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