I'm a high school teacher, and amongst other things teach photography, do the Yearbook, and also take tens of thousands of photos of our students every year. A few weeks ago, 4 of our students, and one of our staff members died in a car accident.
I don't know if this is the right place or not, or if anyone might know of the right place to point me towards, but I'm going through a weird form of grief. I spent the first weekend after the accident going through thousands of photos of them, so they could be given to the families for services, etc, and then created a memorial video. It's been a lot. I don't have much desire to pick up my camera anymore, but I'm also happy I was able to have those memories for those families. Most recently I've been having weird apparitions where I'm seeing them and hearing their voices randomly.
Has anyone in here ever gone through something of this nature or could point me to a good place to seek some help. I'm just an amateur photographer looking for some help. I don't know if this is the place -- this is the first time I've ever posted here, but figured if I was ever going to find someone who'd gone through something similar in their careers, this might be the place.
I'm a high school teacher, and amongst other things teach photography, do the Yearbook, and also take tens of thousands of photos of our students every year. A few weeks ago, 4 of our students, and one of our staff members died in a car accident.
I don't know if this is the right place or not, or if anyone might know of the right place to point me towards, but I'm going through a weird form of grief. I spent the first weekend after the accident going through thousands of photos of them, so they could be given to the families for services, etc, and then created a memorial video. It's been a lot. I don't have much desire to pick up my camera anymore, but I'm also happy I was able to have those memories for those families. Most recently I've been having weird apparitions where I'm seeing them and hearing their voices randomly.
Has anyone in here ever gone through something of this nature or could point me to a good place to seek some help. I'm just an amateur photographer looking for some help. I don't know if this is the place -- this is the first time I've ever posted here, but figured if I was ever going to find someone who'd gone through something similar in their careers, this might be the place.
Thanks,
D....Show more →
First I am VERY sorry for your loss(es)! Do NOT feel you are "weird, unstable, or whatever" niche people would put a person suffering from personal loss want to put you into!
Grief comes in many forms and many mental "presences". Addressing your issue is the FIRST thing you must do!
I believe your grief can be somewhat, if not obtain, a form of "closure", and defined by your photographic actions.
The fact that you have no desire to pick up your camera is not unusual IMHO.
BUT I recommend you think out a photo journalistic article, presentation to honor these souls! It may get your "photographic juices" flowing again. It may not happen right away..give yourself some time to grieve!
It may get you out of your "funk". Been there done that for Vietnam veterans and my brothers and sisters buried at Arlington Natl Cemetery(from any war).
I did such a presentation for many years to those that I served in the military with and those that died during the Vietnam War.
I won't bore other members with this fact.
Their should be many support groups to help you through this.
If you are a "faith based" person, your Pastor, Priest, Minister should be able to help you.
Look to any "social services" you local govt has. Being in a Teacher's Union, they should have some direction for you. That is what you pay "dues" for!
As for "apparitions"? I believe they are part of this grieving process.
My Condolences on Your Loss!
Dan
I'm so sorry to hear this of your friend/students. I think I would be feeling the same grief at this point.
Be thankful that through your photography you provided many memories of them for their families and yourself. Be thankful that through your photography abilities you were able to do this, but whatever you do, don't stop being a photographer. Just take a short break to recover from this loss. The school needs your photography and you need to keep doing it for them. For help in dealing with your feelings, I would talk at length with your church leaders, pastor, minister, etc.
I lost one of my closest friends to COVID, just before the shots for it became available. Each Christmas he played one of the best Santa Clauses that I've ever known in my life. He looked right as Santa, even without the red suit, took very good care of his full white beard all year so he could be Santa at Christmas, and had the right personality to talk with the children at length. He truly loved what he did for them. I had been his photographer for several years, so I had taken many photos of him. It took me quite a while to recover from his loss too, but I am so glad now that I have so many photos of him to remember him by.
I'm a high school teacher, and amongst other things teach photography, do the Yearbook, and also take tens of thousands of photos of our students every year. A few weeks ago, 4 of our students, and one of our staff members died in a car accident.
I don't know if this is the right place or not, or if anyone might know of the right place to point me towards, but I'm going through a weird form of grief. I spent the first weekend after the accident going through thousands of photos of them, so they could be given to the families for services, etc, and then created a memorial video. It's been a lot. I don't have much desire to pick up my camera anymore, but I'm also happy I was able to have those memories for those families. Most recently I've been having weird apparitions where I'm seeing them and hearing their voices randomly.
Has anyone in here ever gone through something of this nature or could point me to a good place to seek some help. I'm just an amateur photographer looking for some help. I don't know if this is the place -- this is the first time I've ever posted here, but figured if I was ever going to find someone who'd gone through something similar in their careers, this might be the place.
The grief you’re going through will pass. The paralysis is a very natural part. You and your camera didn’t cause this and actually the photographs you provided were a positive comfort to the families during their troubled times.
Your chronicles of your students provide them with memories they and their families can keep their entire lives. If you stop, those memories won’t exist, so I would encourage you, at the appropriate time, pick up your camera and begin again. Your other students deserve to have their lives recorded as well. Some may become famous, others will have families and they will appreciate your efforts. The impact a singe photo can have to someone should never be underestimated.
Dee_Bee, I'm so sorry for your loss. I know it has to be very traumatic.
You've been given some good advice already, but I think the most important thing you can do is get some professional help. If your high school has a counselor, start there. She should be able to point you in the right direction if she isn't able to help you herself.
Grief is one of those weird things that takes a while to get over. You aren't going to get past this in a day or two, or even a couple of weeks. There are ways to deal with your grief and a professional can help you tremendously.
spoupard wrote:
Dee_Bee, I'm so sorry for your loss. I know it has to be very traumatic.
You've been given some good advice already, but I think the most important thing you can do is get some professional help. If your high school has a counselor, start there. She should be able to point you in the right direction if she isn't able to help you herself.
Grief is one of those weird things that takes a while to get over. You aren't going to get past this in a day or two, or even a couple of weeks. There are ways to deal with your grief and a professional can help you tremendously....Show more →
She is a teacher. Her California Teachers Union has multiple departments for her to seek help.
I listed the one's she might contact first.
