I have a dilemma that I'm hoping some of my fellow photographers may help me with or have faced. The problem is, what do you guys do when you go on vacation to places with your wife that are full of beautiful photo ops(Yosemite), and thats all you want to do while your there is take pictures. Yet she's there with you, and feels she's just tagging along with you and your camera. We're only going for three days and dont know when I'll return.
I LOVE photography, and Yosemite is a photographers dream come true. Yet my wife will become annoyed quickly because I'll be taking too long composing and traveling with all my gear. Her and I have spoken about this recently and I was hoping I'd get her understanding how I feel. I cant just NOT take pictures while we're there. I think she'd prefer me to be like most people who take snap shots of places as they go with no regard to lighting conditions or composition. I think I'd rather just leave the camera home opposed to doing such a thing.
I know this sounds like a selfish cry for help. And I truly understand my wifes point of view. But can someone help me, is there a happy median where everyone can be happy
Well, three days doesn't give you much time, but it wouldn't seem unreasonable to me to try to carve out a few hours for yourself (if your wife does not want to be a part of it) during one of the days you are there, and during this time, it will be about nothing but photogrpahing. The rest of the time, you leave your camera locked up in your room. It's called compromise and relationships require it. It'd be great if your wife was willing to come along with you during your "selfish" photography time, so that you didn't have to feel like you were abandoning her, and of course she'd have the benefit of seeing what you're seeing during that time, and you'd be together. You'd be making a bit of a 'sacrifice' during the other times when you'd be seeing things you wish you could photograph, but can't. And I'd suggest that this is going to have to be an ongoing negotiation between the two of you. Now if you want to shoot sunrise somewhere in the park and your wife enjoys sleeping in, then that's a freebie for you!
Thanks Russ, obviously words spoken from experience. Or at least you understand relationships. Maybe part of my problem is we've only been married a year, so this might go beyond photography.
What you said about sunrises I already had that in mind. That bad part is, where we're staying is like an hour from Yosemite valley. Which means after the sunrise shoot I'd have to drive back to go get her. Compromise right.
Sorry, I can't help you - my wife has the patients of a saint when it comes to my photography - she once sat in the desert with me for 2 days while I was shooting in Monument Valley...
Best of luck finding a solution for the two of you!
To try to seriously answer your question, I would suggest talking to your wife and see if she won't agree to set part of each day aside to let you take pictures. What might makes sense is to set aside the golden hours (sunrise and an hour or two after and sunset and an hour or two before) to take pictures and then spend all of the rest of the day doing stuff with her and let her pick what she wants to do during those other times. Seems like a reasonable compromise to me. Good luck.
I was thinking the same thing. If she can't beat you, She might as well join you!
Other then that, Just shoot early in the morning, And late in the afternoon (When the lighting is at it's best) And spent the hours when the light isn't that great with your wife!
I was thinking the same thing. If she can't beat you, She might as well join you!
Other then that, Just shoot early in the morning, And late in the afternoon (When the lighting is at it's best) And spent the hours when the light isn't that great with your wife!
I'm upgrading soon and I tried to get her on the D70, not interested. She loves that Canon Powershot
I think I'm gonna do what everyone is saying- Shoot at sunrise/sunset and be with her during day (while I scope out places to shoot)
Edited by xcentric1 on Apr 21, 2008 at 08:54 AM GMT
Like Russ said, it's all about compromise. My wife is also very patient with my habit. I try to keep the time I spend on taking shots reasonable, and there are times where as much as I'd like to shoot, I just leave the camera put away.
Two things that help with her patience is that we both like to take it slow at these kinds of places and enjoy being out there, which gives me some time to set up shots. The other is that she is developing a bit of an eye & while she isn't interested enough to learn the technicalities of photography & pick up a DSLR herself, she is looking with a photographer's eye, and has found a number of really nice shots I might have missed, so it's becoming a team effort. That keeps the interest & patience level higher.
The hardest part for her is the mornings I want to get up & out there really early when she'd rather sleep in. I do all the driving, so she can nap on the way to the location & nap on the way back. I do feel a bit guilty dragging her out at o'dark early, so I try to limit the early mornings as much as I can.
I never get good photos on family vacations, especially now that I have a son.
Before that I could go off for 3-4 hours in Mexico, etc. and work when *my wife* had something *she* wanted to do.
Otherwise take family snaps. Then book a 5 day cheap vacation somewhere where you do photography sun-up to sun-down, buy a pizza, crash at the hotel, wake up and repeat. I do at least 2-3 of those a year. Lately it has been 1 small trip per month during summer/nice weather.
get up and shoot early come back and make coffee for her , find a nice sunset for her , a bottle of wine -shoot the sunset and drink till the stars come out
You need to be there with her, not there with your camera. Put the camera away. Don't make frantic death marches, speeding from turnout to turnout to get the camera out and then rush off again.
Find local sunrise opportunities or stay in bed.
My wife tolerates some of the rush, recognizing that there is some timing to some of this. But she expects vacations are a time to relax and enjoy. She isn't a photographer. She likes seeing me enjoy it, she likes seeing good results. She liked sharing stories and pictures at work with a couple of guys who are "semi-pros" - weekend warriors. She and my daughter are happy with a point and shoot to share. The daughter is somewhat more visual, but she's very willing to pace herself. My wife loves pictures as a social opportunity - sitting around the living room with her mom and sisters and others passing the pictures around. Gathering around the ol'crt just isn't the same for her.
But we will be taking some trips where she wants to go and doing what she wants to do - and that's what some might say is nothing. Relax. Sit. Read. The advantage of reading is she can and will read quietly for reasonable periods in beautiful places.
Make the vacation for the two of you, not the three of you.
Warning, I think I know what I should do but don't do it very well either.
and relationships require it. It'd be great if your wife was willing to come along with you during your "selfish" photography time, so that you didn't have to feel like you were abandoning her, and of course she'd have the benefit of seeing what you're seeing during that time, and you'd be together. You'd be making a bit of a 'sacrifice' during the other times when you'd be seeing things you wish you could photograph, but can't. And I'd suggest that this is going to have to be an ongoing negotiation between the two of you. Now if you want to shoot sunrise somewhere in the park and your wife enjoys sleeping in, then that's a freebie for you!