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Can we talk? Men, and suits
  
 
glort
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p.3 #1 · p.3 #1 · Can we talk? Men, and suits


Craig Gillette wrote:
I just bought a "suit" for a funeral. Turns out only a couple of folks wore suits, even one of the brothers.


Funny, I was only talking to my wife about this 2 nights ago after finding a service booklet.

We went to a funeral just on 2 years ago for a young guy we didn't know but who was my daughters best friends Brother. We knew the mother and father and another sister quite well.
They had been fantastic to us when we lost our son only a couple of months earlier. Everyone that came to my sons Funeral wore a suit and those that Didn't still wore shirts and ties and looked as well groomed as they could. They could have been very casual, we asked for people to come colorfully dressed to make the occasion a bit brighter. People wore bright shirts or Ties but there were not many guys there without a jacket and all the girls came very respectfully and elegantly dressed as well.

The people that came to this other funeral were just astounding. They came colourfully dressed as well...... in shorts, sandals/ flipflops and a lot wore singlet tops. The better dressed friends wore Jeans and maybe a t shirt.
One of my sons mates came and he, like I, wore a suit and tie and looked as good as we could out of respect for the family.
Because the church was only small and there were a few too many people to fit, he and I stayed outside to let the closer friends and family in, They had TV's and sound outside so we could see and hear what was going on.

We were checking out everyone outside while trying not to look like we were and just exchanging glances of " WTF!??" watching these friends roll up half way though the service drinking longnecks ( Full size beer bottles) in paper bags and red bulls by the slab.
Friend noticed that we were also well and truly getting checked out and later was told by the family that a lot of people had asked whom we were? We asked why and the mother said they thought you might have been detectives.
Hmmm, made sense. Many of them looked like they could have had outstanding warrants.

I was saying to my wife the other night how sad I felt for the family that their son's friends should come to his service like that and why they did not have the sense of respect or right doing to come in at least decent pants and a collared shirt with at least some enclosed shoes and socks.
My Daughter pointed out the guy that had passed ran with a pretty rough crowd which was evident. Even still, to me I just don't get how what I could consider basic Civil respect escaped them? Clearly not an age thing as I saw all the young fellas come very well and respectfully dressed months earlier.

That said, I have been to too many funerals since and seen many adults whom are are infinitely closer to their own funeral than Christening, come pretty casually and surprisingly untidy dressed as well.
Just seems weird to me. Even when I have a doctors appointment I make sure I go clean and tidy as a mark of (un) common respect. Often the people I see in the waiting room would be out dressed by people that just walked in from a reasonable serious car crash.

I get around the house often when I am working like the biggest Grot imaginable but there is a time an a place...... Or at least there is for me even if it seems I'm becoming in the minority.



Jul 29, 2017 at 01:44 PM
Craig Gillette
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p.3 #2 · p.3 #2 · Can we talk? Men, and suits


I even changed ties after the service for the reception. She and I had both been teachers so I put on a tie I had used at times teaching - bright yellow with a green frog pattern. Then took off the jacket. Too hot. But I can see colorful at a funeral because some folks are looking as a remembrance and celebration and don't want a see of gloomy black. Traditional or not. But that doesn't mean sloppy and unkempt. I recall a number of events where an administrator and I tied a lot of ties. Elementary kids might not know how but apparently neither did their parents.

And at a restaurant I work at at times, it's surprising how many young men don't know how to tie a tie or get the tails set to correct lengths. Or to get a properly sized collared shirt.



Jul 31, 2017 at 05:35 AM
BSPhotog
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p.3 #3 · p.3 #3 · Can we talk? Men, and suits


Seems topical. Big brother adjusting the groom's pants mid-formals this past weekend.




  NIKON D800    24.0-35.0 mm f/2.0 lens    24mm    f/5.6    1/80s    640 ISO    0.0 EV  




Jul 31, 2017 at 02:36 PM
egd5
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p.3 #4 · p.3 #4 · Can we talk? Men, and suits


I actually don't mind wearing a suit coat/sport coat as long as I don't have to wear a tie. I HATE ties. I think they are the silliest custom society has ever come up with. Why a piece of cloth tied around your neck makes you any more (take your pick of adjective) is absolutely dumb.
I have told my wife that if I go first I want a sign put up at the funeral that no ties are allowed. And if someone wears one, I will come back and haunt their butt for the rest of eternity.



Aug 17, 2017 at 02:57 AM
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