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glort Offline [X]
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I tend to imagine the complaint relayed to someone else.
Shes sitting there telling her friend that you didn't follow her around the reception all night taking pics with every Guest. What's the friend going to think?
On this, my guess would be it would be something along the lines of " Well they didn't do that at Mary, Janes or Bob's wedding either. The other reaction in my mind might be " Why the Fk would you want them to and be taking pics of you all damn night?
The other one, Being overly communicative would be " Well I rather than not talk to me". There are no doubt negative positions they might adopt, I just can't think of any but to me the complaints seem stupid in the first place.
This is the classic Situation where my butt covering policy comes in:
" If there is ANYTHING you want or see on the day you would like a picture of, it's YOUR job to tell me. Come back and say We wanted a picture of this but you didn't get it, then it's YOUR fault for not telling me"
I drum this into them and this is exactly the reason why. They complain I didn't get pics of everyone, well why didn't you ask me on the night?
End of discussion.
Clearly you didn't over communicate or you would have known she wanted you to follow them round like a dog all night. The fact she didn't tell you that on the night is HER fault not yours. I suspect that is really something a parent or someone has said AFTER the fact and now she thinks she has to relay it to cover her own backside with them. I'll also bet there were 10K pics taken on phones that more than cover this and it's exactly why they didn't ask you.
I myself would address the issues because then you have a chance of your response being relayed in the Gossip. " He didn't follow me around taking pics of the guests all night and when I mentioned it to him he said That he isn't ware of anyone doing that and to him it would seem like something that could spoil our enjoyment of the night and socilaising with people. He said had he known that's what we wanted, he could have made a time for all the guest to come up and have pictures taken"
Umm, yeah, I wouldn't want the photographer following me around all night either.
I think the thing you really have to realise is you CANNOT prevent this from happening. Ever. People are effing fruitloops and you can never please everyone.
And I mean that literally. Do not let it upset you or get you down that they aren't singing your praises and having statues made to put in the town centre.
It on't happen every time and the wedding you do that you are proud of punch of and think it is your finest work they will almost undoubtedly be pretty half hearted about as well. That's the game we are in, get used to it.
Some girls, and geez I have had too many, just look for an excuse to whinge and complain. I believe it is the being centre of attention Syndrome as a Phsyc friend explained to me many years ago.
For a year or 2, they have been the centre of attention and topic of conversation with their up coming wedding. At work, with friends, with family, they are the special one. It's like Young female Nirvarna and something they all like to hear about.... Till their friend NEVER shuts up about it but they go along with it anyway because she is their friend. Or they don't want to be impolite.
After the day it's all over and while they are on their honeymoon it's all forgotten and the conversation changes to something other than that girls wedding. Maybe somone else they know is now getting hitched and they have become the centre of the universe.
No, shes not the centre of attention any more and she is not happy about that. Some girls whom are popular at work and with friends don't loose their " position" but others who are just the hangers on in the social group and don't normally get much attention resent falling back into obscurity and then try to stay in the spotlight as long and anyway they can.
Bringing up a complaint about something puts her back in the spotlight and gives her some " Poor Victim" factor sympathy as well.
Unfortunately we as shooters are one of the few, if not only people she gets to deal with after the event so guess who is going to be the prime candidate in the firing line?
US!
Now it may not be to that degree with this girl, but I give you a gilt edged promise, you stay in this game not all that long and you WILL get them. No doubt. I have had Husbands and Mothers sit there with the complaining bride telling her she is imagining things and there is nothing wrong with the pictures and they will still work themselves into a crying hissy fit over the most ridiculous shit. I have had them complain about one picture and there is another the same taken 2 sec later of the exact same thing and they are crying because I took the picture when she blinked in that one or she doesn't look good. Looking good being an indefinable thing she still can't articulate other than I should have known and made the picture better and she's not happy with it even though the next one is apparently OK.
I just sit there and think " WTF has this poor guy got himself into?" and I have seen the same thought going through more than one guys head in the way he looked back at me.
I would respond, gently addressing the complaints, reiterating that you did the best you could for her and did your best to try and please her, hence asking questions.
Given she has recommended you this could be confusion OR things other people have said rather than a position of any commitment she has herself.
Set her straight gently you were only doing your best ( and no one has the shooter follow them round all night which is why you didn't and wouldn't ever do that and leave it at that.
If you get 3 complaints, look at what you are doing but if the last 3 couples were all happy, Then don't try and make the rules for the exceptions.
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Sep 25, 2016 at 10:10 PM |
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