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Archive 2016 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...

  
 
Brian Virts
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p.1 #1 · p.1 #1 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


I'm considering not working for the groom anymore. It just seems like every time the groom owns photography it turns into manipulation by the bride with ridiculous requests and expectations. If I'm not working with her directly it seems she manipulates the groom which extends out to me. My current situation is not really bad, but I have encountered this before and I don't like it. I much prefer working with a pro planner or the bride directly.

Has anyone else experienced this when working for the groom?



Aug 29, 2016 at 11:22 AM
jcolman
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p.1 #2 · p.1 #2 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


To be honest, I've never encountered a problem working directly with the groom. In fact, things seem to go smoother when I deal primarily with the groom. However, most of the grooms I've dealt with have some or a lot of knowledge of photography so maybe that's the reason.





Aug 29, 2016 at 11:27 AM
Brian Virts
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p.1 #3 · p.1 #3 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


This was a very high-end wedding, I charged a ridiculous amount of money, but they wouldn't go away. They love the photos, it's just coming down to what she can pull out of the deal now. It's not a big issue, just more work, which I'm going to charge them for.


Aug 29, 2016 at 11:33 AM
IrishDino
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p.1 #4 · p.1 #4 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


Examples would help.



Aug 29, 2016 at 12:31 PM
glort
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p.1 #5 · p.1 #5 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...



I can only remember dealing with a couple of Grooms directly.
They were both mature couples, one was a 2nd wedding.
They went very well and smoothly and were real nice guys. That's how I remember them as against all the others I have forgotten.

Oh, I do recall one guy that would intervene in things now and then. Turned up late one night drunk as a skunk wanting me to hand over all the prints and negatives.

That ended really bad for him.
As the ensuing argument got really heated and turned physical, my grandmother who lived with me got worried and called the cops. As he was driving out the street at a great rate of knots after I sent him packing, the cops picked him up and got him for high range DUI.
That was just an unfortunate wedding from the start. They got married because they " Had" to and clearly the girl was way too nice for this clown. I don't think they lasted long at all.

The ones I have had trouble with have almost always been the cheap low end jobs. They haven't necessarily been cheap on my part. They have paid my upper middle ground cost but skimped on the rest of the day.

When I find out it's a pretty low buck affair, my guard goes up and I am cautious now.
Like with the OP, it seems after the day they have a propensity to complain and want more in compensation. You start off wearing it to keep them happy then something else comes up, you fix that and then they create some other mystical, never mentioned before problem.

Lucky I haven't had that for a long time now. I have learned to be in control of the transaction and let them know that so I get the respect that deters these whingers early on.

99% of the grooms I shoot are bored out their skull by the whole wedding process and the only thing they want is for it to be over!



Aug 30, 2016 at 12:24 AM
Dawei Ye
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p.1 #6 · p.1 #6 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


The only thing worse than a Bridezilla is a Groomzilla


Aug 30, 2016 at 02:48 AM
Mark_L
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p.1 #7 · p.1 #7 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


It's easy but brides often tend to be way more particular about things so I'm wary there isn't any conflict in expectation. I try and deal with whoever 's name is on the contract.


Aug 30, 2016 at 07:13 AM
ricardovaste
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p.1 #8 · p.1 #8 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


Brian Virts wrote:
This was a very high-end wedding, I charged a ridiculous amount of money, but they wouldn't go away. They love the photos, it's just coming down to what she can pull out of the deal now. It's not a big issue, just more work, which I'm going to charge them for.


Qualify the people you're working for before you have a legal obligation.



Aug 30, 2016 at 07:56 AM
Brian Virts
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p.1 #9 · p.1 #9 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


glort wrote:
I can only remember dealing with a couple of Grooms directly.
They were both mature couples, one was a 2nd wedding.
They went very well and smoothly and were real nice guys. That's how I remember them as against all the others I have forgotten.

Oh, I do recall one guy that would intervene in things now and then. Turned up late one night drunk as a skunk wanting me to hand over all the prints and negatives.

That ended really bad for him.
As the ensuing argument got really heated and turned physical, my grandmother who lived with me
...Show more

I'll STFU now!




Aug 30, 2016 at 09:14 AM
Brian Virts
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p.1 #10 · p.1 #10 · Brides working through the Groom as the middle man...


It's really just coming down to expectations on their end changing based on what she wants (now), which could have been mitigated way early on. Not a huge deal, my time is $$$$$, I take care of my clients, but I have no problem charging them for it.

I really think it's her just being difficult to abuse him. He wants to make her happy and since he owned photography she can now manipulate him into getting something different than origianlly asked for. I can't go into details to protect myself and clients.



Aug 30, 2016 at 09:15 AM





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