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Archive 2015 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo t...

  
 
sherijohnson
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p.1 #1 · p.1 #1 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


I am getting my fair share of guys that don't like their picture taken..... SO I would love to hear any tips of how you warm them up to getting them to loosen up and participate.


Dec 24, 2015 at 11:30 AM
klee.007
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p.1 #2 · p.1 #2 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


#penisjokes


Dec 24, 2015 at 11:57 AM
IrishDino
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p.1 #3 · p.1 #3 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


In my experience, they're either putting on a "tough guy" front which disappears if you build some rapport or they're deeply insecure; I've given up trying to help the latter.


Dec 24, 2015 at 12:39 PM
nolaguy
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p.1 #4 · p.1 #4 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


Merry Christmas, Sheri,

I am that guy.

Growing serious about portrait photography has really caused me to reflect on the matter - a lot.


I'm not saying this applies to all of us guy-type-dudes, but these have been my issues and what I try to do about it when I shoot other guys (and this is worded from your standpoint, not mine. It's seldom I ask a guy to seduce me).


Issue: Sometimes posing for photos has felt vain. I feel stupid doing this.

Guidance: It's not. For your family and your legacy, you need to be photographed. Man up. Don't be a douche. Get over it.



Issue: I don't know what to do and so I tend to exaggerate so it looks like I'm just goofing off and not trying to pose for a real photo because I know I'm not good at it.

Guidance: Just chill out, trust me and listen to what I say. I won't let you look bad and when the others present understand I have control over this and you're just following my direction, it will be much easier for you. T r u s t me. I have you.



Issue: I love to laugh and smile, but when I try to smile for a picture it looks like I'm trying to smile for a picture.

Guidance: Again, just listen to me. I can see the smile in your eyes and I know how to make it natural. All you have to do is chill out and trust me. This isn't a photo session. It's you and me cutting up.

Guidance: And on that note, give me your eyes. My lens is me looking at you. Look back at me, deeply. I want you to seduce me. I want to see your heart and soul and joy - or pain - in your eyes as you gaze into the glass.

Guidance: Trust me. You'll love the way you look in front of my eyes, brain and lens.


Relax and simply do as I ask.

This is easier than you realize. I understand your apprehension. Let me do what I do. Trust me.


And I am going to blow your mind.





Edited on Dec 24, 2015 at 05:54 PM · View previous versions



Dec 24, 2015 at 01:06 PM
nolaguy
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p.1 #5 · p.1 #5 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


I meant this playfully among friends but it was in poor taste. I meant no disrespect.

My apologies.


Edited on Dec 28, 2015 at 08:30 PM · View previous versions



Dec 24, 2015 at 01:14 PM
TTLKurtis
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p.1 #6 · p.1 #6 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


I keep a tiny satchel with chunks of ripped beef jerky attached to my belt. Whenever the guy does a good thing, I give him a little piece followed by a manly pat on the ass (keeping a completely flat, stiff hand is crucial here... floppy hand or a little curl feels like grab-assin')... then say 'Good job, sport.'


Dec 24, 2015 at 01:50 PM
JBlaze725
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p.1 #7 · p.1 #7 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


Never realized wedding photographers were so funny. I guess you have to be to get the job done. Don't know if they're related but the one that did my wedding wasn't funny and wasn't good.


Dec 24, 2015 at 02:13 PM
TTLKurtis
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p.1 #8 · p.1 #8 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


JBlaze725 wrote:
Never realized wedding photographers were so funny. I guess you have to be to get the job done. Don't know if they're related but the one that did my wedding wasn't funny and wasn't good.


I think to be a good photographer you really have to be able to make your subjects comfortable and a good sense of humor goes a heck of a long way to making them sort of forget they're being photographed.



Dec 24, 2015 at 02:30 PM
amonline
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p.1 #9 · p.1 #9 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


Communication.

I always allow for about 20-30 minutes of just talking time before a shoot. I plan for it. I meet couples somewhere where we can just take a moment to sit and chat. I don't pull out any gear whatsoever. Girls are always easy to talk to and get to open up for photos.

When I have a guy that I can tell is shy, I immediately turn the "chat session" to involve him as much as possible. Get them talking about how they met, how he asked her to marry him, what hobbies they share, what are his "guy" hobbies, etc. They may still be a little shy, but at least now they are looking at you as a friend, and will open up. I know this works for me guy-to-guy, but I think it may help you.

IMO, jokes are not the best go-to. Some guys (introverts) may actually pull away even more, or get uncomfortable.



Dec 24, 2015 at 03:17 PM
form
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p.1 #10 · p.1 #10 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


Alcohol.

Barring that...whatever other people are saying.



Dec 24, 2015 at 04:00 PM
sherijohnson
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p.1 #11 · p.1 #11 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


I have mentioned the alcohol for loosening up those that really need some artificial confidence. I have been doing a LOT of direction on those that don't know what to do in front of the camera and I am making sure to ask if they feel I am giving them enough direction, etc. Some guys are just not as easy going in front of the camera.... so I am all for learning the tricks. When I have a lady present, then crude jokes are likely not going to go over well. But I think having her whisper something to him, etc., tickle him, stuff like that, could help break the ice because we all hear how certain people do not ever smile and those the are the guys I am talking about. I am certainly open to learning some new tricks but to keep it respectable when in mixed company. Thanks for all the tips so far, hope to get more


Dec 24, 2015 at 09:23 PM
TTLKurtis
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p.1 #12 · p.1 #12 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


amonline wrote:
IMO, jokes are not the best go-to. Some guys (introverts) may actually pull away even more, or get uncomfortable.


There is a difference between having a sense of humor and between 'telling jokes' - telling jokes is one of the most awkward ways to interact with a couple, it's not a stand-up gig. I've got a buddy who likes to tell really lame jokes he finds on Google. Cringeworthy.



Dec 24, 2015 at 10:33 PM
amonline
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p.1 #13 · p.1 #13 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


I can't stand coming to this board these days. Some just want to argue, no matter what you say or write. Obviously, I didn't literally mean telling lame jokes. I didn't say "telling" jokes. I just said jokes... as in joking around... as in having a sense of humor.


Dec 24, 2015 at 11:03 PM
nolaguy
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p.1 #14 · p.1 #14 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


TTLKurtis wrote:
There is a difference between having a sense of humor and between 'telling jokes' - telling jokes is one of the most awkward ways to interact with a couple, it's not a stand-up gig. I've got a buddy who likes to tell really lame jokes he finds on Google. Cringeworthy.


---------------------------------------------
amonline wrote:
I can't stand coming to this board these days. Some just want to argue, no matter what you say or write. Obviously, I didn't literally mean telling lame jokes. I didn't say "telling" jokes. I just said jokes... as in joking around... as in having a sense of humor.



I'm confused, Alan. I thought you and Kurtis were saying the same thing?





Dec 24, 2015 at 11:08 PM
TTLKurtis
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p.1 #15 · p.1 #15 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


amonline wrote:
I can't stand coming to this board these days. Some just want to argue, no matter what you say or write. Obviously, I didn't literally mean telling lame jokes. I didn't say "telling" jokes. I just said jokes... as in joking around... as in having a sense of humor.


You said jokes so I assumed you meant it literally as I know people who literally tell jokes and it is absolutely awful. Chill out and drink some egg nog buddy.

Really every couple is different and you've got to use your discretion. We have some more conservative and serious couples that we are pretty vanilla with.



Dec 25, 2015 at 12:13 AM
JHerr
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p.1 #16 · p.1 #16 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


amonline wrote:
I can't stand coming to this board these days. Some just want to argue, no matter what you say or write. Obviously, I didn't literally mean telling lame jokes. I didn't say "telling" jokes. I just said jokes... as in joking around... as in having a sense of humor.


Aren't you one of the biggest offenders when it comes to arguing?

There is a difference between "jokes" and "joking around".




Dec 25, 2015 at 02:45 AM
swainsons
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p.1 #17 · p.1 #17 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


Have you had your photograph taken? I tell you its not easy. Get somebody to do a photoshoot with you as the model. You will learn more in that session than anything else.

Good luck.



Dec 26, 2015 at 04:48 AM
giddyup
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p.1 #18 · p.1 #18 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


The guy needs to suck it up and stop being such a baby who needs coddling.

You probably don't want to tell him that, though.

Try getting them to do stuff rather than lots of static posing. Walking shots, dancing, piggyback, lifts, carrying her,. Ask him to make HER laugh. If he still looks miserable while she is laughing than the guy needs punched in the face.



Dec 28, 2015 at 06:29 AM
sherijohnson
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p.1 #19 · p.1 #19 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


swainsons wrote:
Have you had your photograph taken? I tell you its not easy. Get somebody to do a photoshoot with you as the model. You will learn more in that session than anything else.

Good luck.


while this is good advice, I have been a photographer for a LONG time..... SO I can be a better subject than someone who doesn't like to have their photo taken, plus I smile all the freaking time, so it wouldn't be much of a learning experience for what I was asking about



Dec 31, 2015 at 10:38 AM
lilyphoto
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p.1 #20 · p.1 #20 · Warming up an engagement/wedding subject that doesn't like their photo taken


amonline wrote:
When I have a guy that I can tell is shy, I immediately turn the "chat session" to involve him as much as possible. Get them talking about how they met, how he asked her to marry him, what hobbies they share, what are his "guy" hobbies, etc. They may still be a little shy, but at least now they are looking at you as a friend, and will open up. I know this works for me guy-to-guy, but I think it may help you.



I'm female and this works for me, too. I've found that guys who are camera shy tend to have been "talked to" from their bride in the days leading up to the session and that makes things even worse.

Also, acknowledging the fact that I know getting your picture taken is awkward helps me a ton. I usually start the session with super easy poses to get them warmed up and say things like, "You guys are doing great, you're really photogenic! I don't say that to all my couples, I promise. :-) "

99% of the time within the first 10 minutes or so the guy (and girl, even) warms up and it's a non-issue for the rest of the session.






Dec 31, 2015 at 04:34 PM
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