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Archive 2015 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.

  
 
kirstin
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p.1 #1 · p.1 #1 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


I have to write a photography tips editorial piece aimed at brides.

I am kind of over it before I begin to be honest. Just wondering if anyone has any funny tips that are not only useful, but actually entertain the reader..

I'm running a shot of a couple getting soaked by a wave, along side the tip "If you're photographer is an ex professional beach lifeguard with 25 years surfing experience, and he tells you not to stand that close to the sea - don't look at him and say it will be fine."

Any gripes or stupid stuff welcome.

Merry Christmas

K






Dec 20, 2015 at 02:23 PM
hardlyboring
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p.1 #2 · p.1 #2 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


When you are getting ready...Don't get ready in a bathroom.
Portraits...noon...just say no.
Want a fun photo of the entire wedding part? Actually do something fun...don't just have everyone jump up and down like little kids!



Dec 20, 2015 at 03:20 PM
LeeSimms
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p.1 #3 · p.1 #3 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


1. Lie to your hair & make-up person and tell them you need to be done an hour earlier than you need to be.

2. Lie to your shuttle service and tell them you need to be at the venue 30 minutes before you actually need to be.

3. Appoint a time czar in your inner circle whose job it is to keep you on time. The linear concept of time goes out the window on your own day so you need someone else to look at the clock (and crack the whip).

4. Pick up the getting ready room, especially near the windows. Play some fun music, turn off Fox News.

5. Nobody drinks until the dress goes on.



Dec 20, 2015 at 04:15 PM
IrishDino
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p.1 #4 · p.1 #4 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


Please stop with the multiple locations for formals. Life would be so much easier on everyone if we just did everything but the creatives in one spot.


Dec 20, 2015 at 04:30 PM
TTLKurtis
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p.1 #5 · p.1 #5 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


Tell your friends and family to shut up with the 'It's your day, they aren't going to start the ceremony without you, take all the time you need' - No, stupid, no you cannot just dilly dally all you want. If you do that, you're not going to have time for the portraits you wanted, and your friend is just trying to calm you down and isn't thinking about all the things that are impacted by you running behind. For example, ceremony starts 30 minutes late plus your officiant had a moment of divine inspiration and added an extra 45min to your hour-long ceremony with random stories and readings you had no clue about, and you don't have cocktail hour... now your food is going to be overcooked and/or cold because the caterer has no idea, and probably the single most expensive part of your wedding day is not going to be enjoyed by anyone... because you wanted to fuck with your hair a little bit longer to get it looking like this stupid magazine picture, because you didn't do a hair trial or because your makeup artist / hair stylist is your 8 months pregnant cousin who can't stand for more than 10 minutes at a time, and isn't an actual professional to begin with. (none of this is hypothetical btw)

Edited on Dec 20, 2015 at 07:15 PM · View previous versions



Dec 20, 2015 at 05:25 PM
thebeginning
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p.1 #6 · p.1 #6 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


TTLKurtis wrote:
Tell your friends and family to shut up with the 'It's your day, they aren't going to start the ceremony without you, take all the time you need' - No, stupid, no you cannot just dilly dally all you want. If you do that, you're not going to have time for the portraits you wanted, and your friend is just trying to calm you down and isn't thinking about all the things that are impacted by you running behind. For example, ceremony runs behind 30 minutes and you don't have cocktail hour... now your food is going to be overcooked
...Show more

Damn this hurt to read, so many memories of timelines being thrown out the window due to slow/late makeup and the attitude of "let's just try to keep relaxed above all else"



Dec 20, 2015 at 07:08 PM
glort
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p.1 #7 · p.1 #7 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.



Mine is mainly a time scheduling thing as well.

If the hairdresser or MUA tell you they are going to do you last because they want you to look fresh as possible, hire someone that knows what the hell they are doing.

WITHOUT FAIL, they will run late and while all the bridesmaids are ready and get plenty of pics, who is the one that's going to have to be rushed to try and stay anything like on time?
When the hell does the guest of honor at any event have to wait till last anyway?
They get the royal treatment which is get everything first and waited on hand and foot. WTF is it with these stylists that want to make you wait like the person up the back in the cheap seats??

Also, If a couple or 3 hours is going to make such a difference to how you look between getting done first or last, what the hell you going to look like time you get to the reception 4-6 hours later?


Whoever came up with the thing about the bride has to be fashionably late to church is a Moron.... and a spinster.
The bride needs to be there ON TIME.

You arrive at the correct hour, get some pics getting out of the car, have the doddery old women come up and tell you how lovely you look, organise the whining bridesmaids, get read the riot act from the priest, get everyone seated and fire up the Funeral march for the living, by the time you hit the end of that runway where the bloke is standing knees knocking trying not to soil himself, you are 10-15min late already which is plenty fashionable enough for any clueless romantic fuddy duddy.
Anything more than that and the day goes to hell in a hand basket with the cascading effect of running further behind.


Before you decide on those bridesmaids dresses, could you imagine them being seen dead in them anywhere else but a fancy dress party?
If you can't, then don't have them for your wedding either!

Having your friends as bridesmaids is not an excuse to put them in outfits that will have them ridiculed for the rest of their born days for how stupid they look and people asking if it were some kind of joke.
And NO, that lovely shade of flouro Pink/ green/ blue is NOT going to look lovely in the pictures. It's going to look even more hideous than it does in real life but no one wants to upset you by telling you so even though they will be gossiping behind your back about it for years and in a few years, you are going to be wondering if you were smoking Crack and just don't remember it?
I mean if you picked those dresses, not remembering smoking crack makes a lot more sense than what on earth could have possessed you to pick those dresses otherwise right?


THINK about timing. If you want to have the church service at 4PM in winter, you are NOT going to be able to go to that fantastic location 30 min away and have pictures..... well not any that have any backgrounds visible because the light was gone 30 min before you said " I do" let alone stuffed around chatting outside the church and drove half way across the city to get there.

Is it seriously so hard for people to think this stuff through?? So long for the church, so long to yap and buggerise around, so long to travel.....and getting a bridal party out of a car and 30Ft to where you want them to stand is a 10 minute exercise IF you have experience working on a sheep station or know how to heard cattle. Add another 5 min if you haven't.
Hmm, that makes it 6PM before you get there! Good job you thought that through before you booked everything.... oh, wait.....


Don't bother to bring your photographer that sample shot you would love to have on the rolling hill of a wheat field silhouetted in the late afternoon sun when you are having your wedding on the Harbor foreshore in the middle of the city and the nearest wheat field is 300 KM away and the whole area is flat as a sheet of glass...which is why it's a farming area in the first dam place!
This would be funny if I weren't thinking of it from REPEATED practical experience.

Likewise, Don't ask for all these fashionable night shots in the city if your wedding is in a country town 2 hours away from any building over 2 stories high.

None of these mistakes is the end of the world though.
It's probably only your first wedding and you'll do a better job on the next 3.

Hopefully!




Dec 20, 2015 at 09:12 PM
nolaguy
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p.1 #8 · p.1 #8 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


Good gosh I feel better. I've known for a very, very long time Glort was holding back and not really saying what was on his mind.

Good to finally see and read some candor from you, mate.






Dec 20, 2015 at 09:40 PM
WiredMike
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p.1 #9 · p.1 #9 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


OOOH OOOH I can add to this!!
During the reception when your photographer is taking pictures is not the time to ask him to get pictures of you leaving the ceremony....at 10pm at night. In a non lit parking lot... Because you sent a text to the wedding coordinator and not the photographer....
And then wonder why the pictures look like they were lit with a flash.....
And wonder why you didn't catch that one funny moment where you all line danced to that one song....



Dec 21, 2015 at 08:32 AM
Mark_L
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p.1 #10 · p.1 #10 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


Get a dress that actually fits. No, I'm not PSing 400 frames of you spilling out of it when your weight loss plan turned out to be too optimistic

Are you really going to look and order prints of the 20 variations of virtually the same people you have requested in your group pictures? Do you want your guest's memory of your wedding of lining up for pictures for 1hr?

No I will not copy all the shots in your pinterest fantasy of rainbows and castles when you are getting married on a golf course because it was cheap

If the photog or video guy suggests a drone you are going to have a bad time



Dec 21, 2015 at 09:12 AM
Scott Mosher
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p.1 #11 · p.1 #11 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


Glort, if you ever wrote a book filled with wedding stories (the good, the bad, the funny, the sweet) written the same way you write here, I'd buy it in a heartbeat.


Dec 21, 2015 at 09:32 AM
kirstin
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p.1 #12 · p.1 #12 · Photography tips for the Bride - editorial.


Ah that hair and make up tip is gold. They have ruined many a morning for me.


Dec 23, 2015 at 06:14 PM





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