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Archive 2013 · nearly but not quite

  
 
Tim Ashton
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p.1 #1 · p.1 #1 · nearly but not quite


C&C please

There is much I like about this shot BUT am not happy

If I could have moved to the right it would have helped but there was a red hot lpg powered salamander with a table full of customers so that was out of the question, but there (to me) is something more not right

Also, is it too noisy for iso 640? processed in LR with sharpening 60 ish and then gentle noise (45) reduction applied

Thanks

Tim





Wibur's cafe




Aug 16, 2013 at 05:58 AM
NathanHamler
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p.1 #2 · p.1 #2 · nearly but not quite


not too noisy, but the white balance difference from the outside to the inside kinda bugs me....and it seems just a little too tight...like you said though, wasn't the best time as there were people around.....


Aug 16, 2013 at 07:38 AM
leighton w
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p.1 #3 · p.1 #3 · nearly but not quite


Make it B&W and you have it!


Aug 16, 2013 at 07:41 AM
James Burden
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p.1 #4 · p.1 #4 · nearly but not quite


For me, I think it needs a little more contrast to make it pop.....I think the noise is fine. Using your photo I just did a white/black point curve adjustment and it brought out some detail I think....I'm seeing a vertical crop in the image as well...how do the chairs in the foreground look?









Aug 16, 2013 at 08:28 AM
DTOB
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p.1 #5 · p.1 #5 · nearly but not quite


Pushing the sharpening that hard and then upping the NR will lead to a watercolour type of effect.

Do you need to be so aggressive? What is your final output, web? Print?

If you use masking when you are sharpening, you can avoid sharpening things like the shadows and such that will only end up looking like noice. Hold down ALT (I think it's ALT..maybe CTRL) while moving the masking slider and it will highlight the edges it will sharpen making it much easier.

Also, I agree on the contrast. I'm not sure I'm crazy about the comp, but I understand you wanting the Wilburs sign in the shot.



Aug 16, 2013 at 09:40 AM
the solitaire
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p.1 #6 · p.1 #6 · nearly but not quite


For me there is just too much information in that frame.

Now if you would crop out the full width but about 1/4 of the height, fitting the person in there youŽd have what is possibly an awesome panorama shot.

B&W might help too.

The ceiling doesnŽt help
Neither do the chairs



Aug 16, 2013 at 09:55 AM
ja_joyce
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p.1 #7 · p.1 #7 · nearly but not quite


the solitaire wrote:
The ceiling doesnŽt help
Neither do the chairs


That is my feeling too. There are too many different things going on in the frame for my eyes to find a main subject. Think about what in the scene attracted you in the first place and crop everything else out.



Aug 16, 2013 at 10:58 AM
form
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p.1 #8 · p.1 #8 · nearly but not quite


Care to send me a link to the RAW file?


Aug 16, 2013 at 12:22 PM
Guari
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p.1 #9 · p.1 #9 · nearly but not quite


There is too much disconnection, distance, empty but busy space. IMO, the composition and maybe the choice of FL / placement does not work.

I do empathise and understand what you were trying to achieve..



Aug 16, 2013 at 02:40 PM
grimace3
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p.1 #10 · p.1 #10 · nearly but not quite


just looks like a snapshot to me, I cant really figure out what would make it better


Aug 16, 2013 at 03:55 PM
workerdrone
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p.1 #11 · p.1 #11 · nearly but not quite


PP - WB correction and exposure brushes. My eye wants to be drawn to the the chef and still be aware of the venue (restaurant name).

If you reshot, I'd want to use remote flash in the kitchen and tone down the foreground so I'm drawn to the chef - maybe get some flame in there (alcohol in a pan) suggesting that the remote flash lighting in the kitchen came from the fire itself



Aug 16, 2013 at 05:31 PM
Tim Ashton
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p.1 #12 · p.1 #12 · nearly but not quite


gentlemen

I thank you all. It is a great worry for me. 67 years old and I still havnt learnt
Collectively you nail my biggest fault as a photographer; I lack patience. I walk by, I see a scene but I oh so often compromise what I want to achieve by not spending the time to get the composition that my mind initially saw.
Your responses are what make FM such a great resource. The ability to post and get generous and objective crits.
Hey Grimace3 (emmanuel) There are many more diplomatic ways to prick an old mans ego than by telling the truth
Thanks all

Tim



Aug 16, 2013 at 06:10 PM
Jan Brittenson
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p.1 #13 · p.1 #13 · nearly but not quite


It's not clear what the image is about. It has no clear key point, and the viewer's attention is draw to the only person visible. What is that person doing? The problem with the image is it lacks story. It's not about anything. It's not communicating anything.

One good trick when shooting is ask yourself what you would write. For instance, "Joe is prepping for dinner in his restaurant as the first evening patrons are arriving." Then turn around and try to show this story visually.



Aug 16, 2013 at 07:22 PM
CGrindahl
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p.1 #14 · p.1 #14 · nearly but not quite


leighton w wrote:
Make it B&W and you have it!


+1

I'd also step to the LEFT so the black board inside the restaurant will become invisible. There is too much happening here. I don't like the ceiling and the stools rather casually scattered about distract as well. I'd likely crop and top and bottom and make is a wide shot with the name and man in the kitchen... in black and white...

Give us a link to a RAW file and let us play... that would be fun. You can use Dropbox to make a NEF file available...



Aug 16, 2013 at 08:46 PM
Joseph.
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p.1 #15 · p.1 #15 · nearly but not quite


It's missing a clear subject. What are you trying to show the viewer? the name of the restaurant? the person in the middle? the table? Find a dominant subject and lead your viewer's eyes to it.


Aug 17, 2013 at 12:35 AM
Alan321
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p.1 #16 · p.1 #16 · nearly but not quite


Tim, what were your NR and sharpening settings ?

Does the NR include a high detail level ?
Did you include colour NR ?

Does the sharpening include some masking and and a high detail level ?
(And btw 45 is not gentle NR in Lr)

I can see that the camera might underexpose the person behind the counter with all of that white tile and shiny metal in scene to make it seem bright overall. Underexposure = noisy. Normally you would need little or no NR at ISO 640 but in this case the person is probably a key point of interest and NR is important.

- Alan



Aug 17, 2013 at 11:23 AM
Alan321
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p.1 #17 · p.1 #17 · nearly but not quite


Jan Brittenson wrote:
It's not clear what the image is about. It has no clear key point, and the viewer's attention is draw to the only person visible. What is that person doing? The problem with the image is it lacks story. It's not about anything. It's not communicating anything.

One good trick when shooting is ask yourself what you would write. For instance, "Joe is prepping for dinner in his restaurant as the first evening patrons are arriving." Then turn around and try to show this story visually.


- and then see if the photo still works without the written words. Anything that needs a caption has missed something.

- Alan



Aug 17, 2013 at 11:24 AM
birdied
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p.1 #18 · p.1 #18 · nearly but not quite


Tim, I 'm going to go out on a limb here . You know I mainly shoot macro and wildlife not people or places ,so with that in mind, here is what I would do with the shot as far as crop goes. Did a bit of clarity and sharpening also.

Hope you don't mind.








Aug 17, 2013 at 10:17 PM
Birdbrooks
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p.1 #19 · p.1 #19 · nearly but not quite


the solitaire wrote:
For me there is just too much information in that frame.

Now if you would crop out the full width but about 1/4 of the height, fitting the person in there youŽd have what is possibly an awesome panorama shot.

B&W might help too.

The ceiling doesnŽt help
Neither do the chairs


+1 I think it would look very interesting if done so!



Aug 18, 2013 at 06:41 AM
Birdbrooks
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p.1 #20 · p.1 #20 · nearly but not quite


As in birdied's example; I would go even further in cropping the bottom line, almost up to the serving counter. The image then may not appear to some to be compositionally "complete", but as an image in say, a promotional piece or lining the top of a menu page for this restaurant: very appealing.


Aug 18, 2013 at 06:45 AM
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