I have seen things like this before, and can appreciate you are trying something for fun.
My Quick Comment:
My eye is drawn to the open mouth and open nostrils.
In my opinion, that weakens the image.
I suggest a reshoot with those two things minimized (mouth closed, different POV to the face).
I hope these comments help you.
Hi steady hand, what i meant with it being a fun shot is that we just wanted to do something different and wacky but as you have said there is need for improvement and shall make sure i put your suggestions in place next time and pay attention to detail.
Your CC is very much appreciated
