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Archive 2012 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Nee...
  
 
Graceology
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p.1 #1 · p.1 #1 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


I photographed a wedding on April 14 of this year and it was beautiful, bride and groom were amazing and the photos turned out stellar. Less than 2 months later I get the email below from the groom's mother:

"I doubt if you will get in orders for pictures of this wedding since my daughter in law has been having a affair with a co-worker at her office!!! What a f*%#@ slut! Ben is getting his marriage annulled. She has been with this guy since last November. We thought she hung the moon, what a joke. If you have any pictures of them on your website, I would greatly appreciate it if you would take them down. You do amazing work, I wish you both the best."

Now, my problem is that the venue where they got married has the photos on their site, used in advertising and they are just really good photos that get a lot of attention on our site. Should I take them down? Just wanting to hear both sides of the argument.

Thanks everyone!



Aug 06, 2012 at 03:41 PM
andrewhenders
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p.1 #2 · p.1 #2 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


What does your contract say? Who signed it?

Do you spell out your permitted uses of the photographs? Something like "The Client agrees that (photographer) may reproduce, publish, exhibit, and otherwise use the photographs of the Client’s Wedding for purposes of display, publication, self-promotion, portfolios, exhibition, competition, website or any other reason that (photographer) deems appropriate."

If all your bases are covered with your contract then it becomes a personal decision. I understand the groom's mother point of view but at the same time as a photographer you rely on the photographs to get you future work, as you are doing now. You didn't create the situation. You did your job well and you should reap the benefits of that.




Aug 06, 2012 at 03:57 PM
Graceology
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p.1 #3 · p.1 #3 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


The bride signed the contract and here is an excerpt from my contracting:

"Unless otherwise specified, it is understood that any and all rights to proofs, final or sample prints, thereof shall remain the property of the Studio and may be used for advertising, display or any other purpose thought proper by the Studio."

I understand the situation too and I know it is hard to see the photos, but at the same time, just don't go on my website and look at the photos. People book us because they love our work and our style. This bride was over the top gorgeous in the photos so it really showcased our photos.



Aug 06, 2012 at 04:01 PM
Phyl
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p.1 #4 · p.1 #4 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


It's one wedding. It's a family embarrassment. Her son will get married again some day and she liked you. I'd take down anything that had her son it it but leave up portfolio worthy stuff of details and bridals. It isn't worth leaving them up, contract or no contract... IMO.


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:03 PM
Graceology
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p.1 #5 · p.1 #5 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


That's definitely an option Phyl, thanks for that suggestion.


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:05 PM
Mitch W
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p.1 #6 · p.1 #6 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Phyl wrote:
It's one wedding. It's a family embarrassment. Her son will get married again some day and she liked you. I'd take down anything that had her son it it but leave up portfolio worthy stuff of details and bridals. It isn't worth leaving them up, contract or no contract... IMO.


+1 to that



Aug 06, 2012 at 04:10 PM
michaels photo
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p.1 #7 · p.1 #7 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Her son will get married again some day

Would you, if that was you?

I know I would not, I did it once, and that was enough!

I tell my kids, if you stuck your hand in a electric socket, would you do it again?!

NOT ME!!

On topic: (sorry)

Phyl's opinion is right on to me!




Aug 06, 2012 at 04:10 PM
Graceology
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p.1 #8 · p.1 #8 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


He may get married again, but they moved up north. She made him quit his job here and move up there with her after the wedding. Crazy crazy crazy


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:12 PM
michaels photo
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p.1 #9 · p.1 #9 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


She made him quit his job here and move up there with her after the wedding

How old is he?

I love/ed (past-RIP) my momma but she would not make me move and quit my job!

Like you say... Crazy crazy crazy!




Aug 06, 2012 at 04:16 PM
MarcAnthony
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p.1 #10 · p.1 #10 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


It'll make you look better if you take them down and ask the venue to take them down too. I'm sure the venue would respect your integrity in honoring her wishes and would most likely recommend you more as a result.


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:16 PM
 

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tobicus
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p.1 #11 · p.1 #11 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Graceology wrote:
He may get married again, but they moved up north. She made him quit his job here and move up there with her after the wedding. Crazy crazy crazy

Sounds like a mama's boy. She's not going to let him get remarried anytime soon and she's probably not going to be fond of marriage in general, which means no referrals. Keep that in mind.



Aug 06, 2012 at 04:17 PM
Graceology
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p.1 #12 · p.1 #12 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


No, I meant the bride made them move up to where she wanted to go after the wedding. He is a PGA pro, had a cush job but went where she wanted him to go.


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:20 PM
Graceology
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p.1 #13 · p.1 #13 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Sorry for the confusion on that post about him moving. His mom didn't make him go anywhere


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:22 PM
whtrbt7
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p.1 #14 · p.1 #14 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


I second the motion to keep portfolio worthy shots and then scrap the rest. We're in the service business so first priority is servicing clients. I've had requests to hide or eliminate photos on my website due to legal difficulties. The last thing you want to do is to leave photos up and get either your clients or associates in trouble.


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:27 PM
Micky Bill
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p.1 #15 · p.1 #15 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


You may have the right to keep the pics on your site or advertising but is that the right thing to do?



Aug 06, 2012 at 04:28 PM
joosay
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p.1 #16 · p.1 #16 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Sounds like an ethics dilemma.


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:30 PM
michaels photo
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p.1 #17 · p.1 #17 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Graceology wrote:
Sorry for the confusion on that post about him moving. His mom didn't make him go anywhere


Ahhh, gotcha and thanx for the clarafication!



Aug 06, 2012 at 04:31 PM
qwyjibo
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p.1 #18 · p.1 #18 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


What would you like them to do if you were in their shoes?


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:34 PM
Graceology
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p.1 #19 · p.1 #19 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Honestly, if it was me, I wouldn't go to the site where I know there are photos. If my wife cheated on me, I wouldn't be on her Facebook account every day searching out photos. Their full names are not on the blog post so potential clients that see the work would never know the difference. As a previous post said, we didn't create the situation and our job was done to their approval. It's a tough decision because I agree with both sides of the topic.


Aug 06, 2012 at 04:39 PM
idyfohu
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p.1 #20 · p.1 #20 · Mother In Law wants photos taken down from our site: Need advice


Graceology wrote:
Honestly, if it was me, I wouldn't go to the site where I know there are photos. If my wife cheated on me, I wouldn't be on her Facebook account every day searching out photos. Their full names are not on the blog post so potential clients that see the work would never know the difference. As a previous post said, we didn't create the situation and our job was done to their approval. It's a tough decision because I agree with both sides of the topic.


Quite the quandary right? Yuck. And I agree and completely see your point...but then I can see the other side of the coin too.

And obviously your dilemma is you don't want the pictures taken down, potentially resulting in lost dollars/exposure as a result...but you also don't want to offend the family at the same time (even though it had nothing to do with you). I'm just fortunate I'm not in your position with that call to make...good luck!



Aug 06, 2012 at 04:55 PM
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