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Archive 2012 · Boyfriend Issues
  
 
Chad S
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p.1 #1 · p.1 #1 · Boyfriend Issues


So this model wants to do a shoot with me. Sounds great.

I came up with a few ideas, and she liked them. Excellent.

When I threw out a few wardrobe ideas, she suggests that this be a nude shoot. Great, even better.

We've been hashing out details for the past week or so. Her female cousin is supposed to come along and help with hair and makeup. Beautiful.

Now, suddenly, she tells me that her boyfriend isn't happy about this whole idea, and refuses to let her do it unless he's present.

Initially, this is fine with me. It's not like I'm trying to get in her pants. She has an "interesting" look, but quite frankly, I wouldn't touch her with a 10 foot pole.

After thinking about it for a while, the idea of a jealous, possibly combative boyfriend looking over my shoulder while I shoot his nude girlfriend doesn't sit well with me.

My studio is in my home. I've seen this guy's profile on Facebook. He looks like the kind of guy you'd see in a police lineup.

So I told her I'm going to pass, and she understands, but I'm curious to hear if anyone else has been in this situation before, and what you did, or would have done.



Feb 28, 2012 at 07:23 PM
TJSarchett
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p.1 #2 · p.1 #2 · Boyfriend Issues


Sounds to me like you dd the right thing. Of course he'll probably now tell her "See, I told you he just wanted to git in your pants."

Know when to say "no."



Feb 28, 2012 at 07:27 PM
Chad S
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p.1 #3 · p.1 #3 · Boyfriend Issues


TJSarchett wrote:
Sounds to me like you dd the right thing. Of course he'll probably now tell her "See, I told you he just wanted to git in your pants."

Know when to say "no."


I feel bad, because now it probably does look like that, but it was well beyond my comfort zone.



Feb 28, 2012 at 07:29 PM
Deebo
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p.1 #4 · p.1 #4 · Boyfriend Issues


I've never dealt with anything like that but it sounds like way more drama than it's worth so I would've bailed on it too.


Feb 28, 2012 at 07:29 PM
misternikko
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p.1 #5 · p.1 #5 · Boyfriend Issues


Good call on bailing. You wouldn't have been yourself worrying about that the entire time anyway.

As for what he thinks or says now, who cares. You are still doing you!



Feb 28, 2012 at 07:46 PM
Chad S
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p.1 #6 · p.1 #6 · Boyfriend Issues


misternikko wrote:
Good call on bailing. You wouldn't have been yourself worrying about that the entire time anyway.

As for what he thinks or says now, who cares. You are still doing you!


Exactly.

With a shoot like this, you need to say certain things to the model to bring out her sex appeal.

You have to be turned on at least a little, regardless of what your ultimate intentions are. How would that ever work with the boyfriend hanging around?



Feb 28, 2012 at 07:56 PM
alaskalive
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p.1 #7 · p.1 #7 · Boyfriend Issues


Photography is an art, a professional art when done by professionals.. sex has nothing to do with taking photos of nude people.. much like a patient disrobes for a medical person.

Do photographers have sex with models? Yes, some times if that is the situation.. but I am sure there would probably have been a relationship prior to the shoot.. unless both were so attracted to each other that they could not resist...

I have only shot one nude person, that was a maternity shoot that turned nude in the end.. and the boy friend was there, happy to be watching UFC on my 60 inch tv while we did the shoot in the same room.

I think professionals doing professional work have no problems..

But in this case, possibly would be a problem? Never can tell..
With only one experience shooting a maternity shoot nude.. I do not have enough background to comment much further.. I do know the expressions and emotions are captured in any photograph.. so if a person were to do a shoot of a nude subject, and the needed photos were to reflect erotic looks.. then it would be a bit uncomfortable to do the shoot, say the things that need to be said to get the model to display the proper attitude, expressions, emotions.. if the model's bf or gf were not in tune with the work involved in a professional shoot.

I am perplexed a little, as I have one model who is very beautiful.. I would love to get her to do some artistic shoots.. nude, semi nude.. mostly not showing anything.. but I have no idea how to present my desires to her...would never want to offend her.



Feb 28, 2012 at 08:37 PM
dadagallery
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p.1 #8 · p.1 #8 · Boyfriend Issues


Woman showed up with her boyfriend once, I took him aside and let him know he was welcome but only if he was silent the whole time and from a distance (so they would not be making eye contact). He was cool, and the shoot went fine. Everyone happy with the images. If I didn't get the right feel from him initially, I would have told him why I was canceling the shoot, and it would be because I believed she would be too distracted to make good images. No rules, just have to feel out each situation.


Feb 28, 2012 at 08:47 PM
guitarslinger
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p.1 #9 · p.1 #9 · Boyfriend Issues


what alaskalive said……….


Feb 28, 2012 at 08:48 PM
misternikko
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p.1 #10 · p.1 #10 · Boyfriend Issues


^ thats great advice (dada).


Feb 28, 2012 at 08:49 PM
 



Chad S
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p.1 #11 · p.1 #11 · Boyfriend Issues


You guys didn't see the pictures of this dude.

I know it's wrong to judge a book by it's cover, but I wouldn't even want this guy on my property, and especially not in my house



Feb 28, 2012 at 09:01 PM
misternikko
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p.1 #12 · p.1 #12 · Boyfriend Issues


! i hear that!


Feb 28, 2012 at 09:11 PM
Jim Rickards
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p.1 #13 · p.1 #13 · Boyfriend Issues


I recently had my (minor) son's picture taken by a pro photographer for a newspaper story. (No, he wasn't nude ) After showing me around his studio, he announced: "I shoot alone. You can wait in the gallery."

Sounds very professional to me. I suppose the nude part would make some people want a chaperone, but I think the chaperone could wait in another room too. You don't need distractions - eyes going the wrong way, and the model worrying about what someone else is thinking is appropriate or not.



Feb 28, 2012 at 09:14 PM
Chad S
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p.1 #14 · p.1 #14 · Boyfriend Issues


Jim Rickards wrote:
I recently had my (minor) son's picture taken by a pro photographer for a newspaper story. (No, he wasn't nude ) After showing me around his studio, he announced: "I shoot alone. You can wait in the gallery."

Sounds very professional to me. I suppose the nude part would make some people want a chaperone, but I think the chaperone could wait in another room too. You don't need distractions - eyes going the wrong way, and the model worrying about what someone else is thinking is appropriate or not.


And I don't need to worry about what he's stealing in the other room.



Feb 28, 2012 at 09:17 PM
saaketham
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p.1 #15 · p.1 #15 · Boyfriend Issues


Chad S wrote:
You guys didn't see the pictures of this dude. I know it's wrong to judge a book by it's cover, but I wouldn't even want this guy on my property, and especially not in my house

He might have made a great prop.

I did have something similar happen to me. I usually shoot outdoors, but do have stands and a white background at home if needed. A friend of mine had me shoot her portraits during fall, outdoors and she was thrilled. She asked me if would shoot her bikini photos. I did. I had a mutual female friend come with us to the lake and I had my friend help with posing the model. She changed bikinis mid-shoot in the back of my car and the shoot went well. She was thrilled with this set too. She later asked me if I can do her lingerie shots and I said ok, but let's do it indoors. She said ok, but then, it never happened and she soon moved to a different state after marrying her boyfriend. A few months later, she texted me one day, and told me that she'd just got done modeling for a calendar, and she said it was because of my photos of her that she had the confidence and that those photos in her portfolio are what got her the calendar gig.

A few months later, she said she's coming back to my town to visit her old friends and so I asked her if she wanted to do the lingerie shoot. She said she'd love to, but her husband didn't like her modeling and that he'd asked her not to. So, I told her that even though she liked modeling and was disappointed in her husband's opinion, it's not worth hurting the person she loved the most. She agreed. And that was that.

We went to the bars a few times, watched a basketball game, ate out with other friends, but no lingerie shots. Also, the husband in this case was on the other end of the criminal spectrum - he was a very nice, well-educated geek earning decent money doing a good IT job. But, if a photoshoot will cause a rift between two people, then I think it's best to drop the idea. I think your canceling it is the best decision.



Feb 28, 2012 at 09:30 PM
WiPhotoguy
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p.1 #16 · p.1 #16 · Boyfriend Issues


made the right call....I have shot glamour with a BF present, but they were always clean cut and fine. I wouldn't let someone of questionable/unknown character into my home based studio either


Feb 29, 2012 at 01:56 PM
marti.g3
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p.1 #17 · p.1 #17 · Boyfriend Issues


I work with a lot of glamour and import car models. Upfront I tell them they are free to bring a "girl" friend, sister or any female escort with them but NO males. If they are not good with that, I don't shoot with them. I've had rare instances where a male did come but It is rare and I thoroughly vetted him prior to okaying it.

In your case, that guy would have put a freezing chill on the shoot. And if the model is not mature enough to tell him to go fly a kite, then I don't want to shoot with her.




Feb 29, 2012 at 03:00 PM
marti.g3
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p.1 #18 · p.1 #18 · Boyfriend Issues


Chad S wrote:
Exactly.

With a shoot like this, you need to say certain things to the model to bring out her sex appeal.

You have to be turned on at least a little, regardless of what your ultimate intentions are. How would that ever work with the boyfriend hanging around?



I totally disagree with your assertions. A photographer has to be turned on a little to get excellent professional glamour/nude photos ? That is just rubbish.
Go ask Arny Freytag from Playboy if every time he walks on set he's got a woody going.

If you are professional, know what you are doing, and have your game plan set for your shoot, then you will be able to do a professional job. Rapport with your client is imperative, and that is set in motion well before the shoot.

If she has seen your work, you guys have spoken, gone over her thoughts on what she likes, what style she wants and what work of yours does she like, then once you get on set, the confidence that she has in you will allow her to open up her sensuous side and relate to the camera.

Showing her the images as the shoot goes along does wonders for her self confidence and normally at the end of the shoot, most clients don't want it to end. They are in love with the photos and they can't believe that " that is me ! "

If one is doing it for shits and giggles, well then that's a whole other story. And I do know photographers who do it with ulterior motives.

http://istudio.com/26890


Edited on Feb 29, 2012 at 03:37 PM · View previous versions



Feb 29, 2012 at 03:09 PM
Chad S
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p.1 #19 · p.1 #19 · Boyfriend Issues


marti.g3 wrote:
Go ask Arny Freytag from Playboy if every time he walks on set he's got a woody going.


That's not what I meant by "turned on". I mean mentally turned on.

You have to be excited about anything you shoot, otherwise, what's the point?

I would find it hard to be excited about the way the shoot was going with some creepy looking dude giving me the death stare from behind.



Feb 29, 2012 at 03:16 PM
marti.g3
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p.1 #20 · p.1 #20 · Boyfriend Issues


Chad S wrote:
That's not what I meant by "turned on". I mean mentally turned on.

You have to be excited about anything you shoot, otherwise, what's the point?

I would find it hard to be excited about the way the shoot was going with some creepy looking dude giving me the death stare from behind.


Oh I agree. I would never shoot with a BF on the set. I've had husbands there who were photographers themselves who actually were helpful in getting the model to relax during the shoot but that is rare.

I find that having a strong online portfolio/gallery that a client can review does wonders for establishing
that rapport prior to the shoot. Confidence is everything. Reputation is everything.

http://istudio.com/26890



Feb 29, 2012 at 03:41 PM
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